Overheard in the souq

Shop owners have mixed up their English a few times while E & M were walking through the souq. Some memorable ones:

"Please come, we have rotten fruit and vegetables.." (meant fresh)
"Won't you come into my shop? We have expensive scarves" (meant cheap)
"We have nasty clothes, come look" (meant nice)

M was also heard shouting "left" "right" or "down" so that E could avoid looking at the carcasses hanging in front of the numerous butcher shops...The lamb heads were too much, even for M.